Happiness 210

In Arianna Huffington’s Fearless Voices site, in a blog entry titled “Happiness Is. . .”, Anastasia Goodstein writes about The N. Y. Times Magazine article “Happiness 101″ on Martin Seligman’s positive psychology. She questions psychoanalysis and a bit less so, psychotherapy, and then she cringes at, although supports, David Lynch’s efforts at getting TM into the schools.

“Happiness 101″ describes Seligman’s intentions to teach happiness in high schools to “restore ‘wholeness’ to the teenage years” and to convey “sense of certainty” that the 60s took away. Is that “sense of certainty” what made movies like “Rebel without a Cause” and “Peyton Place” blockbusters? When Betty Friedan interviewed women in their homes in the 50s she found a “problem with no name,” not June Cleaver. And ‘wholeness’ is not a feeling that people in transition, whether teens, mothers of toddlers, or new-to-retirement boomers, experience.

Here’s what I replied to Goodstein:

Thinking happy thoughts and reading upbeat literature is not the key to happiness and mental health but understanding the simple dynamics of emotions, thinking, and shifting awareness is.

To frame happiness a bit differently, apply a bit of systems thinking: You feel good when there is a flow of information, matter, and energy running through you that results in health and bonding with others. When threatened, you protectively reduce the flow. Anger, fear, and depression signal that your thinking is circular, negative, and focused on real or perceived danger.

We learn as infants how to shift from anger and fear back to a more clear, open state. Prayer, meditation, martial arts, and professional training are all cultural ways to “step back” from more intense fear and anger, open perspective, clear thinking, and get the feedback necessary to respond effectively.

Another essential piece is required for feeling good: A recognition of and trust in your innate wisdom. The ancestral brain is the result of 13 billion years of adaptation to this planet. It is the source of synthesis, insight, and understanding. If you don’t get something right the first time, when you step back from fear and open up, you can trust your brain to adjust and adapt.

Unfortunately, in our culture, wisdom is attributed to old people or the very young. It’s considered the purview of religion and mystics. It’s certainly not for everyday people. Our culture has it wrong. Happiness results when people, sometimes against the beliefs of those around them and despite their own past performances, learn to recognize and then trust themselves.

Rather than “restore a sense of certainty” to teens, promote the belief that everyone is capable of living with inevitable uncertainty, if not always happily, at least creatively. The process is the ticket that can set us all—young, old, rich, poor, advantaged, or disadvantaged—free.